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Funny

«The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.»
Author: Dave Barry (Humorist, Writer) | About: Funny, Problems, Religion, Writing | Keywords: come after, offending, offends, religious, risk, run, sincerely, writing
«The optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears it is true.»
Author: J. Robert Oppenheimer (Physicist) | About: Funny, Optimism | Keywords: best of all, optimist, pessimist, possible worlds, worlds
«The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.»
Author: Jay Leno (Comedian, Host) | About: Funny | Keywords: doctors, journal, journals, Journal of, New England, reports, The Journal
«The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.»
Author: Jeff Foxworthy | About: Funny | Keywords: designate, designated, designated driver, designates, desirable, driver, drop, drop off, fun, house, job, most desirable, program, programmed, sucked, suck in, suck up, The Night
«The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook»
Author: Julia Child | About: Food, Funny | Keywords: cook, diet, diets, steak, steaks
«The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.»
Author: Lucille Ball | About: Birthday, Funny, Youth | Keywords: staying
«The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.»
Author: Marty Feldman | About: Funny | Keywords: considerably, mightier, pen, The Sword
«The past is an old armchair in the attic, the present an ominous ticking sound, and the future is anybody's guess»
Author: James Thurber (Writer) | About: Funny, Future, Past, The Present, Time | Keywords: armchair, armchairs, attic, ominous, The Tick, tick, ticking, ticks
«The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.»
Author: Erma Bombeck | About: Funny, Sex | Keywords: breathing, breathings, heavies, heavy, jog, jogging, take up
«The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.»
Author: Oscar Wilde (Critic, Dramatist, Novelist, Poet) | About: Funny, Gossip, Popularity | Keywords: about, at the worst, being, in a bad way, is not, not, only, talked, Talk to Her, Than, their talk, the very worst, thing, this talk, worse
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