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Funny

«Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties.»
Author: Doug Larson | About: Bosses, Funny | Keywords: accomplishing, ADD, boss, bosses, bossing, duties, regular, regulars
«According to this week's Time magazine, President George Bush is a serious fitness buff. He works out 60 to 90 minutes a day with weights. Apparently he likes working out because it 'clears his mind.' Sometimes it works a little too well.»
Author: Jay Leno (Comedian, Host) | About: Funny | Keywords: apparently, buff, buffs, bush, fitness, George, George Bush, magazine, President George Bush, This Week, weights, working out
«Action, Ability and Awareness (in that order) the 3 keys to success.»
Author: Joshua Estrin | About: Funny
«Acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity a human ever has to choose a relative.»
Author: Mordecai Wyatt Johnson (Educator) | About: Funny | Keywords: acquiring, relative
«A line is a dot that went for a walk. »
Author: Paul Klee (Artist) | About: Funny
«Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.»
Author: Casey Stengel (Baseball Player, Manager) | About: Ability, Funny | Keywords: hits, hit home, home runs
«(The Weakest Link) is fascinating program. They ask a bunch of people questions and they keep getting rid of the dumbest person, so just the smartest person is left. It is kind of the opposite way we elect a president.»
Author: Jay Leno (Comedian, Host) | About: Funny | Keywords: bunch, dumbest, elect, fascinating, link, program, smartest, The Weakest Link, weakest
«'Tis but a scratch''A scratch?! Your arm's off!''No, it isn't.'»
Author: Monty Python | About: Funny, Movies | Keywords: heads, head off, scratch
«Actually, I...this may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about...when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me.»
Author: George W. Bush (President) | About: Funny | Keywords: About me, Texan, Texans, West
«'I was going to start off tonight by telling some self-deprecating jokes, but then I couldn't think of any mistakes I've made to be self-deprecating about.' ?President Bush, at the White House Correspondents' dinner, poking fun at his performance in a recent news conference, in which he drew a blank when asked about mistakes he had made»
Author: George W. Bush (President) | About: Funny | Keywords: blank, conference, conferences, correspondent, correspondents, deprecate, deprecates, deprecating, Drew, jokes, most recent, poked, pokes, poke fun, poking, President Bush, recent, self-deprecating, start-off, The White, The White House, tonight, White House
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