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Stephen Wright Quotes

«If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | About: Cats, Funny | Keywords: back, back down, butter, buttered, CAT, cats, down, drop, drop back, drop by, drop down, drop in, drop out, feet, happens, land, lands, on land, side, sided, Side Out, strap, strapped, straps, toast, toasted, toasting
«You can't have everything. Where would you put it?»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | About: Funny
«I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | About: Museums | Keywords: all the, arming, arms, from the, heads, in all, museum, museums, take arms, take up arms, the Other, under arms, went
«I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | Keywords: all over, existential, map, mapping, map out, The map, written
«If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | Keywords: mime, mimes, shoot, shoot for, Shoot Out, shoot up, silencer, use
«I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | Keywords: book, numbers, page, page number, writing
«I installed a skylight in my apartment... The people who live above me are furious!»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | Keywords: above, apartment, furious, install, installed, skylight, skylights, The Apartment, The Apartments, The People
«If you're not part of the solution, then you're part of the precipitate»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | Keywords: precipitate, precipitated, precipitates, precipitating, solution
«A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me. I'm afraid of widths.»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | Keywords: afraid, a lot, heights, in height, lot, width, widths
«Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? The guy who wrote that song wrote everything.»
Author: Stephen Wright (Actor, Writer) | Keywords: alphabet, alphabets, guy, in that, song, wrote
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