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Joan Rivers Quotes

«Is she fat? Her favorite food is seconds»
Author: Joan Rivers | About: Food | Keywords: seconds
«I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.»
Author: Joan Rivers | Keywords: everyone else, succeeded
«Can we talk?»
Author: Joan Rivers
«The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found.»
Author: Joan Rivers | Keywords: fugitive, fugitives, The Fugitives
«Our natures are a lot like oil, mix us with anything else, and we strive to swim on top.»
Author: Joan Rivers | Keywords: mix, swim
«Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.»
Author: Joan Rivers
«Yeah, I read history. But it doesn't make you nice. Hitler read history, too.»
Author: Joan Rivers
«Don?t talk to me about Valentine?s Day. At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!»
Author: Joan Rivers | About: Ageing, Valentine's day
«Never admit that your back goes out more than you do.»
Author: Joan Rivers
«God always comes up with a third act twist -- and we won't know until we die whether the play was a comedy or a tragedy.»
Author: Joan Rivers
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